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[[File:Swanson pyramidofgreatness.png|thumb|480px|Swanson Pyramid of Greatness.]] |
[[File:Swanson pyramidofgreatness.png|thumb|480px|Swanson Pyramid of Greatness.]] |
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| − | [[Ron Swanson]] developed the Pyramid of Greatness over the course of many years. It's a perfectly calibrated recipe for maximum personal achievement. Likely inspired by the [http://www.coachwooden.com/pyramid-of-success Wooden Pyramid of Success]. |
+ | [[Ron Swanson]] developed the Pyramid of Greatness over the course of many years. It's a perfectly calibrated recipe for maximum personal achievement. Likely inspired by the [http://www.coachwooden.com/pyramid-of-success Wooden Pyramid of Success]. Ron shows the pyramid while coaching a boys basketball team ([[Go Big or Go Home]]). |
(Categories listed top to bottom by importance) |
(Categories listed top to bottom by importance) |
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==Category 1== |
==Category 1== |
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| − | *Honor: If you need it defined, you don't have it. |
+ | *'''Honor: '''If you need it defined, you don't have it. |
==Category 2== |
==Category 2== |
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| Line 23: | Line 23: | ||
*'''Teamwork:''' Work together as if your life depends on it... IT DOES! |
*'''Teamwork:''' Work together as if your life depends on it... IT DOES! |
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| − | *'''Selfishness:''' Take what's yours |
+ | *'''Selfishness:''' Take what's yours. |
*'''Haircuts:''' 3 acceptable styles: High and Tight, Crew Cut & Buzz Cut. |
*'''Haircuts:''' 3 acceptable styles: High and Tight, Crew Cut & Buzz Cut. |
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| − | *'''Greatness itself:''' The best revenge. |
+ | *'''Greatness itself:''' The best revenge. |
==Category 5== |
==Category 5== |
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*'''Self-reliance:''' Trust yourself. |
*'''Self-reliance:''' Trust yourself. |
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*'''Suspicion:''' Do not trust anyone else. |
*'''Suspicion:''' Do not trust anyone else. |
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| − | *'''Skim milk |
+ | *'''Skim milk''': That's right. It's on here twice. Avoid it. |
==Category 6== |
==Category 6== |
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*'''Romantic love''' |
*'''Romantic love''' |
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*'''Deer protein''' |
*'''Deer protein''' |
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| − | *'''Fish (Sport only |
+ | *'''Fish (Sport only) ''' |
==Category 7== |
==Category 7== |
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| Line 48: | Line 48: | ||
*'''Intensity:''' Give 100%. 110% is impossible. Only idiots recommend that. |
*'''Intensity:''' Give 100%. 110% is impossible. Only idiots recommend that. |
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*'''Torso:''' <span style="color:rgb(41,47,51);font-family:'HelveticaNeue',Arial,sans-serif;line-height:18px;white-space:pre-wrap;">Should be thick and impenetrable.</span> |
*'''Torso:''' <span style="color:rgb(41,47,51);font-family:'HelveticaNeue',Arial,sans-serif;line-height:18px;white-space:pre-wrap;">Should be thick and impenetrable.</span> |
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| − | *'''Old wooden sailing ships:''' |
+ | *'''Old wooden sailing ships: '''They're beautiful |
| − | *'''B.O |
+ | *'''B.O:''' Cultivating a manly musk puts your opponents on notice. |
*'''Stillness:''' Don't waste energy moving unless necessary. |
*'''Stillness:''' Don't waste energy moving unless necessary. |
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*'''Skim milk: Avoid it.''' |
*'''Skim milk: Avoid it.''' |
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| − | *'''Cursing:''' There's only one bad word: |
+ | *'''Cursing:''' There's only one bad word: taxes. If any other word is good enough for sailors, it's good enough for you. |
==Category 8== |
==Category 8== |
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| − | *'''Friends:''' One to |
+ | *'''Friends:''' One to three is sufficient. |
*'''Property rights: '''They exist. Do not let them be taken away from you. |
*'''Property rights: '''They exist. Do not let them be taken away from you. |
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| − | *'''Masonry:''' Building |
+ | *'''Masonry:''' Building walls makes you strong. Defending them makes you even stronger. |
*'''Cabins:''' Places to rest that are made of logs. |
*'''Cabins:''' Places to rest that are made of logs. |
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*'''Perspiration:''' Only sweat during physical activity or love making. No emotional sweating. |
*'''Perspiration:''' Only sweat during physical activity or love making. No emotional sweating. |
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Revision as of 18:04, 28 August 2020
Swanson Pyramid of Greatness.
Ron Swanson developed the Pyramid of Greatness over the course of many years. It's a perfectly calibrated recipe for maximum personal achievement. Likely inspired by the Wooden Pyramid of Success. Ron shows the pyramid while coaching a boys basketball team (Go Big or Go Home).
(Categories listed top to bottom by importance)
Category 1
- Honor: If you need it defined, you don't have it.
Category 2
- America: The only country that matters. If you want to experience other "cultures", use an atlas or a ham radio.
- Buffets: Whenever available. Choose quantity over quality.
Category 3
- Weapons
- Wood working
- Welfare avoidance
Category 4
- Teamwork: Work together as if your life depends on it... IT DOES!
- Selfishness: Take what's yours.
- Haircuts: 3 acceptable styles: High and Tight, Crew Cut & Buzz Cut.
- Greatness itself: The best revenge.
Category 5
- Discipline: The ability to repeat a boring thing over and over again.
- Attire: Shorts over 6" are capri pants. Shorts under 6" are European.
- Self-reliance: Trust yourself.
- Suspicion: Do not trust anyone else.
- Skim milk: That's right. It's on here twice. Avoid it.
Category 6
- Cow protein
- Pig protein
- Chicken Protein
- Romantic love
- Deer protein
- Fish (Sport only)
Category 7
- Intensity: Give 100%. 110% is impossible. Only idiots recommend that.
- Torso: Should be thick and impenetrable.
- Old wooden sailing ships: They're beautiful
- B.O: Cultivating a manly musk puts your opponents on notice.
- Stillness: Don't waste energy moving unless necessary.
- Skim milk: Avoid it.
- Cursing: There's only one bad word: taxes. If any other word is good enough for sailors, it's good enough for you.
Category 8
- Friends: One to three is sufficient.
- Property rights: They exist. Do not let them be taken away from you.
- Masonry: Building walls makes you strong. Defending them makes you even stronger.
- Cabins: Places to rest that are made of logs.
- Perspiration: Only sweat during physical activity or love making. No emotional sweating.
- You: You are your biggest ally and your worst enemy, at the same time.
- Crying: Acceptable at funerals and the Grand Canyon.
- Physical Fitness
Category 9
- Frankness: Cut the B.S.
- Capitalism: God's way of determining who is smart, and who is poor.
- Facial hair: Full, thick and square. Nothing sculpted. If you have to sculpt it, that probably means you can't grow it.
- Living in the woods: Live off the land.
- Rage: One rage every three months is permitted. Try not to hurt anyone who doesn't deserve it.
- Security: Secure the land.
- Poise: Sting like a bee. Do not float like a butterfly. That's ridiculous.
- Handshakes: Firm, Dry, Solid. 3 seconds.
- Body grooming: Only women shave beneath the neck.