This article contains spoilers for the Parks and Recreation show. Continue at your own risk.
|Uh, yes, uh, Leslie Knope is a female person with whom I was, uh, involved. We had... romantic... romantical involvement until I relocated to San Diego. Which is a... that's, uh, in California, which is southwest of here by a number of miles, so, uh, we terminated our involvement at that time.|
|— Dave Sanderson|
Pawnee Police Chief Hugh Trumple is retiring and Leslie Knope hopes to win his endorsement for her City Council campaign before Bobby Newport does. Leslie and Ben Wyatt run into Dave Sanderson, who is visiting from San Diego to attend Trumple's retirement party. Leslie invites him to dinner with her and Ben, much to Ben's dismay since he has an extreme fear of policemen. Meanwhile, Andy Dwyer has written Leslie's campaign theme song "Catch Your Dream" and invites the Parks Department, Chris Traeger, and his band Mouse Rat to Doubletime Sound Studio to sing it; Ron Swanson realizes it is the same studio where he records under his Duke Silver persona and he asks April Ludgate to destroy any evidence of Duke Silver that is present there.
At dinner, Dave privately tells Leslie that he is still in love with her and wants her back, despite Leslie insisting that she is in love with Ben. Dave refuses to listen and says he is considering remaining in Pawnee to become the new Police Chief. The dinner becomes so awkward that Leslie eventually tells Ben that Dave still loves her. Dave and a frightened Ben have a private talk about Leslie in the men's room that ends with Dave handcuffing Ben to the urinal. Dave tells Leslie that Ben ran away, but when Ben calls her cell phone the ruse is up. At the recording studio, Tom Haverford keeps acting like he and Ann Perkins are a couple although Ann regrets their brief date; Chris becomes concerned upon hearing about it. Tom tries numerous ways to woo Ann but they only annoy her. Andy, meanwhile, keeps making everyone sing numerous takes of "Catch Your Dream" but feels none are good enough.
At the retirement party, Ben, extremely nervous, manages to get Trumple's endorsement for Leslie. Leslie finally convinces Dave that she is in love with Ben, but she still wants to be friends if he will stop pursuing her. Dave agrees to leave the two alone and he and Leslie become friends. To help Andy, Ron secretly records a Duke Silver saxophone track for "Catch Your Dream" that Andy loves, finally finishing the song. An annoyed and exhausted Ann eventually agrees to go on a second date with Tom just to get him to shut up.
Andy: I don’t know how many of you have heard, but there’s a flesh eating virus going around. Yeah, it’s called music.
Trumple: Look Knope, I've always liked you, but the Newports run this town, and frankly they've donated a lot of money to the department.
Ben: Mo' money, mo' problems, that's what I always say.
Trumple: How about mo' money, mo' protective kevlar vests that save lives?
Ben: I-I... sometimes I say that, too.
Leslie: I understand you need to think about it, but if you were gonna make a decision...
Trumple: The guys are throwing me a little retirement thing tonight at O'Flinigans. There's gonna be beer so why don't you swing by, I'll give you an answer. Weirdo can come, too.
Leslie: Let's go.
Ben: Oh hey, uh, may I say...
Ben: ...that the boys in blue...
Ben: ...are heroes. Obviously some more than others. Oh boy, here it comes... 9/11.
Leslie: And we're walking.
Tom: I feel like you're embarrassed by me.
Ann: That is accurate.
[At Doubletime Sound Studio, Ron sees a promotion of his Duke Silver alter ego; he quickly takes it off the wall and hides it]
April: [sees Ron] That's vandalism.
Ron: I have a problem. This happens to be the studio where a local saxophone legend named Duke Silver records his albums.
April: I've heard of him. I've heard he makes mature women swoon when he plays.
Ron: From what I've heard about Duke, he's kind of a private guy. He doesn't want his nosy co-workers discussing his music with him or knowing that he exists. So if you happen to see any memorabilia laying around, kindly and discreetly discard it.
April: You got it, Duke.
Ron: Don't call me that.
Ben: I'm not afraid of cops. I have no reason to be. I never break any laws - ever - because I'm deathly afraid of cops.
Dave: I’m going to the gas station, to get a frozen burri-to, and eat it right there at that table.
April: I dig your groovy tunes, man.
Dave: You look like I could use some company.
Ben: He's in love with you and he has a gun.
Ben: [as Dave handcuffs him in the men's room] What... What are you doing?
Dave: I'm doing that.
Ben: Are you serious??
Dave: You brought in on yourself.
Ben: What??! [he looks at the camera alarmed and confused]
Ron: I never thought I would say this to you son, but you may be over-thinking this.
Jerry: [reading a promo for Duke Silver] Hey, you guys, who is this? This looks just like- [April crashes two cymbals in front of him; he reacts in pain] OW, that was loud!
Leslie: Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm about to endorse 10 beers into my mouth because it has been an incredibly stressful evening.